Hmmmmm

So... I have decided to end things with #9. It's just not there for me at all. I feel horrible because there are actually a few other reasons too but he has no idea. And I have NO idea of when I'm going to do it. :(

Yuck

Yuck

Yuck


On happier news.... I'm the proud mama of two male betta fish. Each in their own little tanks :)
I will be moving on to a normal tank and some hopefully cool fish in the next few months but for now they are fun. And.. the best part? They're red! Yep - I'm a dork!

TGIF!

Well I am very happy the weekend is upon us. Ahhhhh. Been a nice week overall but busy as hell.

And now, it's here. And it's payday. And we have our monthly potluck at work. All good stuff. More good stuff too but can't mention it yet. Heeeeee

Things are good with #9...... coming along quite nicely actually. Still not entirely sure I want what he wants but that's why I'm taking it slow. And my heart is still thinking about #7 so until I get that sorted out I will not make anything official.

I guess only time will tell.....


Happy Friday!!

But I do have a life... really I do!

(1) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(2) Grease
(3) Pirates of the Caribbean
() Boondock Saints
(4) The Mexican
(5) Fight Club
(6) Starsky and Hutch
(7) Neverending Story
(8) Blazing Saddles
(9) AirplaneSection

1: 6
(10) The Princess Bride
( ) Young Frankenstein
() AnchorMan: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
(11) Napoleon Dynamite
(12) Saw
() White Noise
(13 ) White Oleander
(14) Anger Management
(15) 50 First Dates
( ) Jason XSection

2: 5
(16) Scream
(17) Scream 2
(18 ) Scream 3
(19) Scary Movie
(20)Scary Movie 2
( ) Scary Movie 3
(21) American Pie
(22)American Pie 2
(23 )American Wedding
(24) Harry PotterSection

3: 4
() Harry Potter 2
() Harry Potter 3
( )Harry Potter 4
()Resident Evil I
( )Resident Evil 2
(25) The Wedding Singer
(26 )Little Black Book
(27) the village() Donnie Darko
( ) Lilo & StitchSection

4: 4
(28) Finding Nemo
(29 ) Finding Neverland
( ) 13 Ghosts
(30) Signs
(31) The Grinch Who Stole Christmas
(32) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
(33) White Chicks
(34) Butterfly Effect
(35) Thirteen Going on 30
() I, RobotSection

5: 4
( 36) Dodgeball:
( 37) Universal Soldier
() A Series Of Unfortunate Events
(38) Along Came Polly
(39) Deep Impact
(40) KingPin
(41) Never Been Kissed
(42) Meet The Parents
(43) Meet the Fockers
( ) Eight Crazy NightsSection

6: 5
(44)A Cinderella Story
( ) The Terminal
( ) the Lizzie McGuire Movie
( )Passport to Paris
(45) Dumb & Dumber
() Dumb & Dumberer
(46) Final Destination
(47 ) Final Destination 2
(48) Halloween
(49) The RingSection

7: 7
(50)The Ring 2
() Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle
( 51) Practical magic
() Chicago
(52 ) Ghost Ship
(53) From Hell
( ) Hellboy
(54) Secret Window
() I Am Sam
(55) The Whole Nine YardsSection

8: 2
(56) The Day After Tomorrow
(57) Child's Play
() Bride of Chucky
(58) Ten Things I Hate About You
(59) Just Married
(60) Gothika
(61) Nightmare on Elm Street
(62) Sixteen Candles
( ) Coach Carter
(63) Bad BoysSection

9: 7
( )Bad Boys 2
(64 ) Joy Ride
(65) se7en
(66) Oceans eleven
( 67) Ocean's Twelve
(68 ) Identity
(69 ) Lone Star
(70 ) Bedazzled
() Predator I
() Predator IISection

10: 1
(71) Independence Day
(72) Cujo
(73 ) A Bronx Tale
( )Darkness Falls
(74) Christine
(75) ET
(76)Children of the Corn
(77) My Boss' daughter.
(78 ) Maid in Manhattan
( ) FrailtySection

11: 4
( ) Best Bet
(79 ) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
(80) She's All That
( ) Calendar Girls
(81) Sideways
(82) Mars Attacks
() Event Horizon
(83 ) Ever After
(84) Forrest Gump
(85) Big Trouble in Little ChinaSection

12: 6
(86) X-Men
() X-2
(87 ) Jeepers Creepers
(88 ) Jeepers Creepers 2
(89) Catch Me If You Can
(90) The Others
(91) Freaky Friday
( ) Reign of Fire
(92) Cruel Intentions
(93)The Hot ChickSection

13: 7
( 94) Swimfan
() Miracle
(95) Old School
(96) The Notebook
( ) K-Pax
(97) Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
(98) Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
(99) Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
(100)Walk to Remember
( ) BoogeymanSection

14: 5
(101 ) Hitch
(102) The Fifth Element
(103) Star Wars Episode I The Phantom Menace
(104)Star Wars Episode II Attack of The Clones
() Star Wars Episode III Revenge of The Sith
(105) Star Wars Episode IV A New Hope
(106) Star Wars Episode V The Empire Strikes Back
(107) Star Wars Episode VI Return of The Jedi
(108) Troop Beverly Hills
( ) Swimming with SharksSection

15: 8
(109 ) Air Force One
( 110) For Richer or Poorer
( 111) Trainspotting
(112 ) People Under the Stairs
() Blue Velvet
(113) Sound of Music
(114) Parent Trap 1
(115) Parent Trap 2
() The Burbs
(116) The TerminatorSection

16: 4
(117) Empire Records
() SLC Punk
(118) Meet Joe Black
() Nightmare Before Christmas
(119) The Silence of the Lambs
(120 ) Sleepy Hollow
(121) I Heart Huckabees (only movie I’ve ever STOPPED watching so technically I haven’t seen it!
( ) 24 Hour Party People
(122 ) Blood In Blood Out
(123) The Virgin Suicides
( ) Battle Royale

Well.... maybe not.

He's nice....

Wow .... I'm not sure if this is long term or what but I enjoy his company and could definately kiss him for hours upon hours. Ha ha

Had a nice weekend..... not going into details here but I know he's into me which is definately nice :) And I think I'm into him. Taking it slow in regards to feelings as it's a whole new thing for me.

And now it's sunday night... back to work tomorrow..... with my new and improved hours! Yay! Earlier quitting time now!

B.O.R.I.N.G

Yup... I'm boring.... but I love it.

Well some exciting news..... in about 5 to 6 weeks I will be officially divorced. Yay! I feel this big weight lifted and will be very happy when I'm officially single again. I think it'll be a great way to start my 30's! Had a really good talk with Ryan yesterday too. We actually got off the phone and he called right back to go over something. He wanted me to know who he was going traveling with - I told him I knew. And that I was A-OK with things..... I really am. And I think he knows that now. What a difference a year makes.

Nothing much else exciting..... other than my usual crushes. One in particular I'd like to do something about but we will see how that pans out.

Date tonight with a guy that I have a nice connection with.... nervous and scared that there will be no attraction in person. Oh well I guess - only way to find out.

Still thinking about #7....... I'm sure that won't go away overnight but I know it will pass, eventually I hope!

*sigh*

So... not a whole lot to post about. Had a pretty boring weekend.

Friday night I hit the video store and rented Red Eye - then proceeded to fall asleep watching it. I've been doing this a lot lately.

Saturday I woke up and instead of running the errands I needed to run... I chatted all damn day. I cleaned too but it seemed that every time I turned around someone wanted to talk to me. Miss Popularity. It was nice but I was very very unproductive. Then I finally showered, went out and bought some much needed cleaning supplies, and then hit the Naughty but Nice Show downtown. I have to say I was a bit disappointed. Too many people. Every booth the same stuff. And just too damn busy. Lasted a half hour and then left. We then hit the local pub and had a couple drinks but ended up seeing a couple guys that we really didn't want to see so we left. Ended up next door at the video store and bought a few really cheap movies. Came home and finally made it through Red Eye. Yay!

Today I woke up and cleaned. Then finally I got out to get some groceries so I could feed the masses. Hosted a candle party and got some cool stuff coming now :) More red for my already very red apartment. Heeeeeeeee

Now I'm being a lazy fool.... did NOT follow my eating today at all. Cookies in the house - not good!

Back on track tomorrow for sure... I'm doing well.

Hmpf

Well I finally am an active blogger and I have no visitors :(

Not much to say tonight..... tired.... am excited to come straight home tomorrow after work as it'll be the first time all week. Yay! As long as I don't hang around late at work flirting with our cute little shipper! Yeah... he's a doll.

Life is such a roller coaster

Well.... I have had pretty much every emotion since sunday. Monday was very rough.... shed a few tears (because I'm silly like that) but was feeling better after talking to friends monday night. Tuesday was a brand new day and I felt pretty good. Was realizing that we are better as friends and I am happy he's in my life but he would have driven me crazy if we were in a relationship.

Then last night, I got a little freaky. Came home to find he's taken me off his faves list on the site we met on and taken himself off of mine. I was so hurt. Yes I'm sure it sounds downright ridiculous to the normal folk out there but we've been on them since August when we met so it hurt. I thought he was cutting off all ties with me. So I msn'd him.... no response. I thought he'd deleted me. I went into panic when he didn't respond. Was very upset but then... after about 30 mins he responded and calmed me down. It was actually a bit humorous. I'm positive he thinks I'm a freak but I promised I don't do that normally and not to worry.

So that's it about that. I feel very calm and content with this. He's a cool guy and I'm glad he's still going to be in my life :) He's great for advice which may just come in handy!

Just wanted to add....

..... that I'm okay. A lot worse has happend to me in the last 2 years. I'm not going to let one silly boy get the best of me.

And I truly hope we can remain friends...... he's funny as hell, I'll give him that.

By the end of this I should be She-Ra.

Well, the old saying goes "that what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger". I'm a big fan of all quotes and "sayings" as they truly all seem very relevent in my life.

So it appears #7 doesn't really have a clue why he said what he did now. Backpeddaling isn't even the word. Ah well. I put myself out there and gave it a shot. Not much more I could have done. Maybe it wasn't the greatest idea but as most of you know I don't always think before doing. I try too - I really do.... just never seems to work that way.

Think I might have scared him off. But wow - if you get scared off by that then you scare a bit too easily for me. I was fully prepared to take things slow... that's how it always was with us. Slow. I didn't like it but I was prepared for it. Now it appears it's over. Well the idea of something more is over anyways. I know that deep down he wasn't right for me but honestly I'm not looking for the One by any means. Not even close to that. Not sure when I will be to tell you the honest truth. Thought I had it once and look where that got me. But it sure would have been fun. I don't even know if I can explain it thoroughly, I just know that I should have really listened to my horoscope today.

It goes as follows:

December 26th:

You may get the impression that someone you really admire is being distant and even frosty towards you. But the celestial configuration indicates that they are probably more than a little overwhelmed by your natural warmth and enthusiasm. The truth is that they are probably very much attracted to you, but just nervous to jump into a relationship so quickly. Just give it a while!

Big red flags to back off here. Yeah.... oops!

January 8th:

You may find yourself uncharacteristically and powerfully drawn to someone whom you just can't get out of your head. The planetary atmosphere is creating a situation in which you feel you would do anything to attract their attention or get them to ask you out on a date. But you would have a better chance if you could cool off a bit; otherwise you may frighten them off.

Please note the "better chance if you could cool off a bit; otherwise you may frighten them off." Yeah.. uh huh. Oops again.

And finally my lovescope for today:

This is an ideal moment to address once and for all the questions that have been on your mind for the last few weeks. Pay particular attention to questions that touch on your sentimental life. If you are currently involved in unsatisfactory relationships, don't be afraid to leave them behind. And if you're fretting about a request

This one sort of scared me a bit... and I think it's what made me just ask him. I don't think we have an unsatisfactory relationship but I wasn't happy with not really knowing. And from what he said last week I really was hopeful for more.

I still want to talk to him and get some answers - but this always seems to be the way with me. I truly thought he was different in that he didn't shy away from telling it like it was. But he did that tonight. Couldn't even give me an honest answer which truly does stink. In the worst possible way.

We are still friends.... not sure I'm ready to not talk to him yet. We have fun and I really enjoy talking to him. Maybe I liked the idea of him? Maybe I really did like him? Maybe he did/does like me but I scared him off. Maybe oh maybe I'll never know.

Ah well, what can you do.

Numerology

Me: I'm a 3. In the biggest way. I still get surprised when I see how accurate it is. I won't go into the details because when I describe the following you'll see it there.

Boy #1 is a 7. And wow is that ever accurate. He's a thinker.

3 + 7 = It's a case of opposites attracting, thinks the analytical Mr Seven, but that's not a negative enough reason for him to erase Ms. Three's phone number from his book. He might have a list of twenty reasons why this relationship can never work, but he also has a list of twenty reasons why it just might, so why toss it aside without giving it a good try? Maybe next time she won't be such a meandering chatterbox. Besides, the roses were lovely and the flirting was fun.
Three isn't so sure she should call Seven again. He wasn't dewy-eyed or warm and fuzzy when they last said good-bye. Still, she's intrigued. It was fun making Seven laugh and he talked intelligently about everything and then pointed out factors that she hadn't considered. In Three's opinion, Seven has the ability to be with anyone he wants. The question is, can she charm her way past his poise and reserve?
It could take several tries before Three and Seven get together, but the undeniable attraction makes them keep trying. When Three can pull herself away from her latest creative endeavor and when Seven decides he is more curious about Three than he first thought, they go for another test spin.
Both of you need plenty of space, and you find that you think and process information very differently. Three is an imaginative, social creature, while Seven has a few selected friends and loves to learn for the sake of knowledge.
Three wants to be happy and has an edless supply of ideas to bring variety into their lives. Seven never tires of learning and endeavors to be an expert at anything he does. While Three is the idea person, Seven quickly sizes up the scheme to see if it can work. This combination of talents turns dreams into reality.

There is so much more that is written but this was the main stuff and very accurate.

Now boy # 2 is a 9. Not nearly as exciting

3 + 9 = Ms. Three is never at a loss for words. Maybe she doesn't always say the right words, but she can fill any silence with chatter, which is why she heads up a department of divergent personality types. She is genuinely concerned about the happiness of others, and her office is a testament to a life revolving around people coupled with her own creative touches, from the framed photo sent with thanks from a prominent billionaire to the macaroni penholder from a young neice.
Three and Nine are entertainers at heart, and both genuinely like people.
Nine inspires others to reach for the stars, and Three has imaginative suggestions on how to make the trip. When they combine forces, the sky's the limit. Both need to strive for personal accolades and recogntion in addition to whatever joint projects they undertake. Nine instinctively knows this and might have to reassure and urge Three to follow his example.

This one is nice but not nearly as fitting as the first.

*sigh* oh well ..... I think it's clear who I would like something more with :)

Boys......

Well I am on the brink of something that I am hesitant to say would be a relationship. Ack. But there are two of them - how do you like them apples?

First there is boy #1 who I met back in August. Have been smitten with him ever since but things have progressed very slowly (which is good btw) since with us spending more time together as of late. There is just something about him. There are many voices in my head saying things would never work etc.. blah blah blah... but I cannot help the attraction. He makes me laugh and if you know me at all then you know that I'm a sucker for that. I love the way I feel with him and how I get butterflies when I'm going to see him. But is it enough? Who knows. Recently I told him of said feelings, something I didn't think I would do so I am very proud of myself. And apparently he is starting to feel the same. He just takes a lot longer with things .... kind of a slow burn he is. A thinker. Thinks everything through. Basically I just need to learn some patience.

Boy #2 is already planning the future. And when this has happened in any past relationships (well those in the last year anyways) I have usually freaked out and ruined the relationship somehow. For some reason I am not freaking out. I can't stop thinking about boy #1 but #2 is really very sweet and I look forward to exploring things further.

So the problem lies in where my decision goes. Do I go for the one I'm more into or the one that's more into me? Do I hold out in hopes for boy #1 and maybe have nothing happen or do I go with the one that I could have a relationship with? Am I really ready? Hmmmmm ... so many questions.

Later tonight or tomorrow I will post what my numerology book says about each boy - numerology has been so accurate in my life so far.

Bad bad blogger I am....

Okay. So maybe this blogging isn't really for me. Honestly I have the time, I'm always on my computer for goodness sakes - you'd think I could at least do a quick post here or there. But alas that isn't really the case. Oh well, it's not like there's a whole lot of people reading anyways - it's more for me.

Had a wonderful christmas, was lovely to be with family this year. They drive me nuts sometimes but I love them dearly. Kids were adorable and liked what I bought them so I'm happy.

Drive up north was nice too.... my little car surprised me. She did great!

And now it's a new year.... yay! I have a feeling I might be embarking on a relationship soon.... not saying more than that but for once I don't think I'm going to freak out. :)